Thursday, September 8, 2011

The Door Swung Open

So, I am taking on a writing challenge today. Awesome blogger, and author Rachael Harrie, has a writing contest for those who are interested in participating (tomorrow is the last day). This is a flash fiction contest, so the content has to be short. In this case, under 200 words.

There is one requirement: to begin the story with the words "The door swung open."

That's pretty cool. And if you want to make it even harder on yourself, end it with "The door swung shut." If you like it even more difficult, keep it EXACTLY 200 words. This is what I decided to do in order to learn the most.

Though flash fiction is difficult --trying to develop, and execute an actual story within 200 words is excrutiating -- it can be done and is a fantastic writing excercise. Below is my story. Go there today and enter your story!

The door swung open. It glided like a dove hovering over the ground, and reminded me of Grandpa’s pond on the ranch in winter, when the ducks were the only ones out there.

The door was lighter than I anticipated. I mean, how did I explain it? Sure, it looked like a pearl, but not like any pearl I’d seen before. The user’s guide never told me to expect an unseen color and that it would be a door-like gate, glowing and shimmering at the same time.

Man's words always seem to be the most inadequate when trying to explain extraordinary places.

I walked through of course, not knowing who opened it. No one was around, but I heard water flowing, and heard grasses swaying, and I swore they were singing…

I pondered the gate again touching it as I walked by. It seemed to quiver with my touch, the way Grandpa’s pond used to look when I threw in a stone.

Then, there he was … Grandpa. Though gone years ago, he was here.

I laughed and saw someone else next to him, and cried out in joy, His gaze pulling me towards Him.

And, the door swung shut.


 
-Heather Spiva

12 comments:

  1. Very nice, I especially loved that part about touching the gate. ; )

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  2. I got cold chills at the line where she sees Grandpa, even though I anticipated it. Very nice.

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  3. Wow, that's a nice and unique concept you have! Love it!

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  4. Your own little heaven. Nicely done. Mine is #72

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  5. What a wonderful scene. It was so peaceful, so serene.

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  6. Great imagery. And I especially loved this line: "Man's words always seem to be the most inadequate when trying to explain extraordinary places."

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  7. Oh, coming in late, but very fun, and I can't wait to read some of the others

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  8. Lovely piece. Beautiful images came to my mind.

    I'm a new follower from the campaign. Enjoy the rest of your weekend.

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  9. I got goosebumps at the end. :) What a lovely welcome into Heaven.

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